That's not it at all. To me it is a feminist perspective. You don't fuck over other women---and for me that is a particular issue when you mess with families. I was a successful writer and clinical psychologist. Didnt need my husband for validation or financial support, or my name or my sense of some status as a married woman. I did need him for his shared role in our family. We're talking about a 43 marriage and a child who was devastated. I had seen far too many children in my practice with deep scars from precipitous break ups. I see my feelings as fiercely matriarchal.

Thanks for your thoughts martha