Ah Grace, I so appreciate your wisdom. In my family (and I think its one of those dark Irish things, ) there's the "It could have been worse" way of reacting to all kinds of awfulness. There's such a difference between what we know and what we feel. I aways forget that when Im ill, I am so much more vulnerable. I am getting connected to a number of new doctors here, so I am hoping to feel better and stronger. Thank you so much martha